"That's life, Betty. You say hello, you walk alongside someone for a while, and then you say goodbye. That's the arc of a life, isn't it? Every minute counts." -Jughead Jones
Who would have thought that a quote on the finale of a teen drama I have barely watched would take bring tears to my eyes and a need to quickly write the quote down? This final episode of Riverdale saw two main characters revisit various points in their lives to say their goodbyes to friends and loved ones. At one point, Betty stands outside a mansion crying, saying she doesn't want to go in and say goodbye. Jughead replies with the above quote. This so succinctly sums up life...walk alongside, say goodbye, every minute counts.
Now, this episode may have felt extra raw because we recently dropped off my daughter at college and as the days crept closer, I found myself counting the days and then hours and then finally, the goodbye. Every minute counted the last 18 years, but I didn't really feel it until the time with her was short. My daughter is also the same age as my sister was when diagnosed with cancer. Oddly, she often reminds me of my sister-in looks, her walk, and sometimes even her short tone of voice when she's tired or grumpy. This odd combination of things has made me extra "griefy" lately, to quote my friend Amanda Held Opelt.
I don't have any amazing answers or secret words that will take care of this. Grief isn't something to just get rid of or take care of. It morphs and changes over time through seasons of life and honestly, just writing and embracing it is better than anything else I have found. If you feel "griefy" in this season of your life, know that you are not alone. There are grief groups and friends who will listen and resources to help you. Reach out. Every minute counts.
If you are interested in writing about your grief, please email me. Guest authors can remain anonymous if desired.